We firmly believe that marriage was created and designed by God, and it is the norm for most people.  The relationship we have with our spouse is only second to our relationship with God. Our spouse should take a ‘backseat’ to nothing or no one here on this earth. Yet current divorce statistics indicate that our culture is doing a poor job at cultivating and maintaining lasting marriages.

As a church, we feel a deep responsibility in helping engaged couples to understand the biblical perspective and principles that will greatly impact their marriage. Here are the guidelines that we have adopted to ensure that we have done our best in helping every marriage be a success. 

Spiritual Unity

The Bible says, “Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? Or what harmony has Christ with Belial, or what has a believer in common with an unbeliever?” (I Corinthians 6:14-15)

We believe that born-again believers should not allow themselves to get emotionally and romantically involved with an unbeliever. The conviction of the pastoral staff in this church is not to marry couples when one of them is a non-believer. Unity in a marriage is primary. Unless there is spiritual harmony and unity, marriage becomes more difficult and complex. Couples need harmony and unity in regard to the priorities and practices of beliefs, worship, church life, lifestyles, and life goals.

Sexual Purity

In a relationship that is headed for marriage, the physical attraction and drive to become intimate will have a tendency to rush the development of the relationship in unhealthy ways. Unless boundaries are drawn by the couple respecting their human desires and weaknesses, marriage plans may be hurried by passion (or even pregnancy), and the development of a solid foundation may be blurred or hindered. Sexual impurity provides a foundation like sand that quickly washes away when the flood of testing comes. Anyone not respecting this truth will pay a high price for years to come. The conviction of the pastoral staff is to not perform the marriage of any engaged couple who are already living together. This lifestyle is in direct disobedience to God’s Word (Galatians 5:19-21 , Ephesians 5:3 , Colossians 3:5 ). Patience and respect for God’s design will bring a wonderful blessing to the Spirit-controlled couple. I Corinthians 7:1 ,  1 Thessalonians 4:3-8 .

Permanent Solidity

God created marriage to be a permanent relationship (Matthew 19:6 , {bible 49}Malachi 2:16{bible}). Unfortunately, we are living in a time when the idea of marriage to one partner for life is treated as a forgotten idea of years past. Many people get married with the ‘escape clause’ of divorce clearly embedded in their marriage commitment. As a church, we want couples to understand that divorce is not a biblical option, and that their marriage vows are life long, regardless of future circumstances.

Pre-marital Counseling

Rather than waiting until a married couple is struggling to get them some good biblical counsel on the principles of a healthy marriage, we want to do this during the courtship time. We would rather do ‘preventative maintenance’ rather than ‘damage control’.  So in order to help couples be more adequately prepared for marriage, each couple who requests their marriage ceremony be performed by FBC Warrensburg will agree to attend a 12 week series of counseling sessions.

In this class, the couple will discuss such subjects as: How to handle conflict, money management, constant communication, roles in marriage, sexual intimacy, understanding the nature and personality of your spouse, etc.

Wrap-Up Sessions with Pastor

Upon completion of the marriage-counseling classes, each couple will then meet two more times with a pastor. The first session will be to discuss what has been gleaned and learned from the marriage-counseling classes, and begin building a relationship with a pastor. The second session will be used to get all of the details and information of the actual ceremony taken care of, i.e. order of service, number of songs, assigned dressing rooms, rehearsal time, etc. Both of these sessions will last approximately one hour.

This pre-marital process is to enhance your understanding of what God expects of us in marriage, and to deepen their commitment level to one another.  We pray that God will bless this process and help husbands and wives devote themselves to the promise they made to one another…‘until death alone shall part us.

Making Reservations

Applications for use of First Baptist Church facilities will be made through the ministry assistant by completing the wedding information form and setting an initial meeting date with a pastor to go over the wedding guidelines. Dates will not be calendared until this initial meeting has taken place.  All weddings at FBC must be conducted by one of the pastors on staff, or a minister of another church upon approval of the pastor.

The church will not schedule weddings or rehearsals during holidays. 

Rehearsal

The rehearsal must begin promptly and on time, since a number of people are involved and delays consume everyone’s time.  Following are several additional rehearsal guidelines:

Both sets of parents, all ushers, and the entire wedding party should be present for the rehearsal, including soloists, candle lighters, etc.

There may not be time during the rehearsal for soloists to rehearse songs, but they should be in attendance so everyone knows the flow of the service. Rehearsal with the accompanist should be arranged at another time.

Fee Schedule

Fees for the wedding are expected to be paid in full before the wedding date. A 50% deposit is due at the time of calendaring the wedding and the balance to be paid before the wedding. Cost sheets are available in the office.

Audio/Media Technicians

FBC trained technicians work the equipment for all events at the church. 

Any additional technical requirements need to be discussed and reviewed by the technical ministries at the time your wedding date is schedule. Additional fees will apply.

Music

Since a wedding is a worship service, the music must promote worship. All music must be either sacred, contemporary Christian or classical. Any exceptions to this must be reviewed and approved by the Minister of Music. His judgment will be based on the word content of the song. All music should be approved at least four weeks before the wedding.

The Bride will be responsible for contacting any musician that she wishes to have play/sing for her wedding. 

Decorations

The wedding closet has items available for use.
 
Items in the sanctuary cannot be moved for the wedding. No furnishings may be moved from other parts of the church. No nails, tacks, staples, screws, pins, tape, or anything that will mar the woodwork, pews and wall finishes may be used. 

Only drip less candles can be used and you will need to purchase or rent the drip less candles. The family is expected to remove all decorations and equipment promptly following the ceremony. 

Facilities staff will not load or off-load equipment or decorations to be used in the wedding. Banners, wreaths, or other church decorations on the walls at the time of the wedding must remain on the walls.

Use of Kitchen

The FBC kitchen is available for use. If the commercial dishwasher is used, please see the custodian for directions for its use. Caterers must leave the kitchen area as clean as they found it or the fee to clean it will be taken out of the deposit. The church does have table coverings.

Use of Other Rooms

Two other rooms are available for the wedding party to use in preparation for the wedding. 

Other Important Instructions

• No alcoholic beverages may be served at the rehearsal dinner, reception, or allowed on church premises.
• No smoking is allowed in any of the church facilities.
• No rice shall be thrown and no confetti machines will be used. Bird seed or bubbles may be used, but only outside of the building.
• No unsightly or inappropriate materials shall be used to decorate the wedding car.
• Dancing is not allowed in the church, however, background music may be played during your reception. Please see the guidelines for music.
• The church is not responsible or liable for personal items.
• The nursery/children’s area is not available for use during the rehearsal, wedding, or reception.
• The church properties must be left in the condition in which they were found.